The feedback on my blog post on Cuffing Season has been so…interesting, that I’m compelled to post a follow up. Quite a few of you have admitted to me that you’ve participated in “Cuffing Season”, even if you never called it that.
For the unititiated, “Cuffing Season” is a term primarily used by African-Americans to refer to the time of the year when it’s colder, and people choose to be “cuffed” to another (until spring and bikini season return, of course). It’s also the time of year when many long-term couples gets engaged (Christmas, New Years’, and Valentines’ Day).
Now that you have a name for what you may have already been doing around this time of year, here are the DatingRelating.com guidelines to make this your best Cuffing Season ever! 🙂
You’re going to be spending a lot of indoor time with this person, so personality is important. Will he binge watch Breaking Bad with you? Is he a Monday night football watcher? If you can enjoy each other’s company during a snowstorm, your cuffing season will be highly enjoyable.
You Win Some, You Lose Some
As cold as some nights can get, not everyone wants an exclusive “Winter Friend”, so if you’ve been turned down by a potential partner, don’t take it personally. Just keep it moving until you find someone better for you.
It’s not a crime to hook up with someone for the cold weather months, but be honest with yourself, as well as your partner. These few months that you share together can be wonderful, but don’t assume that this romance will last past the spring. Be clear with each other about what you want, and how long you want it. The future will take care of itself. Enjoy your time together NOW.
No Playing Hard to Get
Cuffing Season is a short period of time, so this is not the time for game playing. If you’ve decided on a particular guy who also wants to be with you, respond in a timely fashion. This is not the time to ignore texts and calls in order to ratch up the excitement. Be attentive and responsive. You can start a bidding war when bikini season returns.
It can be easy for this new romantic relationship to dominate your life. But that is no excuse for giving up your goals and plans, even for a few months. If you are in school, or starting a new company, or trying to get a new job, continue working in that direction. It’s still important for you to maintain a life of your own, and not put everything on hold simply because there’s someone who wants to sleep with you every night.
Practice Safe Sex
Let’s be honest. The BEST part of cuffing season is all the sex that you’ll be getting from your Indoor Boo. So while you’re going through all your favorite positions in the Kama Sutra, make sure that you both are protected from pregnancy and STDs.
Keep Your Feelings in Check
Cudding Season is a time of High Bonding for a couple, as you’re spending lots of time snuggling, sexing, and eating. It’s just a juicy time for a couple, so delicious and comfortable, that it’s easy to forget that the cold weather that inspired all of this luscious bonding will eventually end. So when you start “catching the feels” remember to pace yourself.
Flex Those Cooking Skills
Going out to eat is fun, but during those colder months, homey meals have a special appeal. Going out will soon be replaced by staying in to watch Netflix, so you may want to A) keep groceries in the house, so you’re not running for eggs and milk when it’s 10 below, and B) Cook a nice cozy meal every now and again. The whole “way to a man’s heart is through his stomach” cliché is a cliché because it’s TRUE. The Cooking Channel and Food Network will not let you down.
If you weren’t already enjoying your Netflix on-demand television service (for those “Netflix and Chill” nights in the summer), Netflix is even more important during cuffing season. You and your “Indoor Boo” may actually watch entire movies together, and even binge watch seasons of “Orange is the New Black”. Cuffing Season will have its share of “couch dates” in front of a TV, so make sure there’s something worth watching.
Family, Friends, & Holidays
If you’re being honest with yourselves, you have to allow that this relationship may not last past St. Patrick’s Day. Knowing that, you may want to keep this relationship indoors, and not introduce each other to friends and family members who will be asking about him later. Not to mention that hanging with friends and family makes things feel more serious than they really are. Never assume that your winter boo will invite you to their family’s holiday gathering, and allow him or her to do something else if they’re not comfortable attending one of yours.
As cozy and romantic as things may be in your apartment, it can be tempting to share some of your moments with the world. Make sure that you are both cool with posting pics of the two of you together on Facebook and Instagram, before your nosy friends start the questioning.